How hot is it in #Palm Desert?

Santa Fe Diary:  how hot is is in Palm Desert, CA?

Our garden, our mountains

In the southern California desert, everyone agrees that 100 degrees is livable because, we say, “It’s dry heat.” But remember “dry heat” also comes from an oven.

By any measure, 120 degrees is a tad uncomfortable.  If you leave your car out in the sun for more than ten minutes and then attempt to open a door without gloves, your skin may weld to the door.   

At 120 degrees, it’s possible to fry an egg on the asphalt, but I strongly suggest not eating it.  At 120 degrees, only mad dogs and fanatic golfers go out in the noonday sun, and most golfers think twice before doing that.

That 120-degree day meant, if we were inside our home, the air conditioners and fans were constantly going, with little discernable effect.  If we went outside, we needed to prepare by taking enough water to satisfy a thirsty elephant, slather on the maximum sun screen while avoiding the ultra-violet rays by skulking in the shade for as long as possible. 

We could also enjoy our swimming pool, unless our feet touched any concrete on the way to the water.   We would high step to the pool as if we were walking on hot coals, which we were.  We could stay in the pool until our shoulders baked and our noses were redder than a clown’s proboscis. 

Our area, called the Coachella Valley, which includes Palm Springs, Rancho Mirage, Palm Desert, LaQuinta and points east, can be seen as beautiful, a haunt for the rich and a haven for some truly strange civic achievements.

 For instance, many people visit or buy homes there because it is possible to play golf as many as 363 days a year (subtracting only two rainy days, or fewer if global warming runs amuck).   Our area is so golf-centric that the road in front of our development has a dedicated lane for golf carts. 

The “but it’s dry heat” defensive response to weather criticism is less true today after our entire region has finally achieved its long-term goal of creating one golf course for every man, woman and child who lives here.   

The watering of hundreds of greens actually changes the local humidity.

The local industries of Palm Springs include golf, tennis and the adoration of celebrities.  We have major streets named after Frank Sinatra, Dinah Shore, Fred Waring, Gene Autry and Buddy Rogers.  When giving directions, it is possible (and even accurate) to say, “…then you go down on Bob Hope,” and the person listening to you will simply nod, agree and never indicate that there is anything remotely funny or obscene about that statement.

Coming from Chicago, it seemed to me that this was that rare American area which did not name a single street after a famous, powerful Irish or Polish politician.

During the summer, the Coachella Valley is under-populated.   Beginning in May, the Valley loses celebrities, Canadians and anyone fearing death by terminal heat rash.   

The Canadians, who could be more than a third of the Valley’s temporary residents during the winter, must return home before the end of a six-month stay in America or they could lose their health benefits.   Despite many complaints about their health system, few Canadians would choose to be at the mercy of the American health services, which efficiently kills over 100,000 patients each year without even trying. 

The vanishing Coachella  Valley population means that, in the summer, it takes much less time to go from one end of the valley to the other.  However, once you get to where you’re going, there isn’t much to do because so many businesses, restaurants and theaters close for the summer.  But then, parking is never a problem in the summer.